Hi! It's your friendly neighborhood therapist in Bel Air, MD back with more tips to explore the relationships in your life. Today I want to discuss the importance of selecting the right kind of people for your support system. Do you have well-meaning people in your life that you love dearly, but do not provide you with the "right" kind of support that you need? Let's discuss some ways for you to identify the right kind of people for the support system that you need to maintain a healthy life!

What Does it Mean to be a Support System?

A support system is a network of individuals who provide various forms of assistance to help you navigate life’s challenges. This can include emotional support during tough times, practical help with day-to-day tasks, and even guidance in making important decisions. A good support system isn’t just about having people around you—it’s about having the right people who understand your needs and can offer the appropriate type of support when you need it most. Your support system can be composed of family, friends, colleagues, and even professional helpers like therapists.

How to Find a Support Network

Finding the right support network can be a bit of a journey, but it’s well worth the effort. Start by looking at the people already in your life. Who do you trust? Who makes you feel heard and understood? These individuals are likely candidates for your support network.

Join community groups, clubs, or online forums that align with your interests and values. These settings can help you meet new people who might become part of your support system. It’s also important to consider professional help—therapists and counselors can provide valuable support and guidance.

How to Know If You Have an Ineffective Support System

An ineffective support system can leave you feeling more drained than supported. If you often feel judged, misunderstood, or unsupported by those around you, it might be time to reassess your support network.

Here are some signs of an ineffective support system:

• You feel more stressed after interacting with your support network.

• Your concerns and feelings are often dismissed or minimized.

• You hesitate to share your thoughts and feelings because you fear judgment or criticism.

If these signs resonate with you, it might be time to have a conversation with those in your support network or seek new support options.

The 7 Types of Support

To build a well-rounded support system, it’s helpful to understand the different types of support you might need:

1. Emotional Support: Providing empathy, love, trust, and care. This includes listening and validating your feelings.

2. Informational Support: Offering advice, suggestions, and information to help you navigate challenges.

3. Tangible Support: Providing practical assistance, such as helping with chores or financial aid.

4. Appraisal Support: Offering constructive feedback and affirmation to help you make decisions.

5. Companionship Support: Spending time with you in social and leisure activities, helping to reduce loneliness.

6. Esteem Support: Boosting your self-esteem by affirming your abilities and worth.

7. Network Support: Connecting you with other people who can offer additional help and resources.

By identifying and seeking out these different types of support, you can create a more robust and effective support system.

Examples of How to Utilize “Fun People” in Your Support System

Here are some examples of individuals who might be great for social support and having fun but might not be the best source for advice:

1. A Fun-Loving Friend: This friend is always up for an adventure or a night out. They bring a lot of joy and excitement to your life, making social gatherings lively. However, when it comes to serious discussions or seeking advice on personal matters, they may lack the depth or understanding you need.

2. The Life of the Party Cousin: Your cousin is the life of every family gathering. They know how to make everyone laugh and feel good. While they are excellent company and can turn any dull moment into fun, their advice on your career or relationship issues might not be as insightful or grounded.

3. Your Gym Buddy: This person is fantastic at keeping you motivated to stay active and healthy. They are a great companion for workouts and fitness challenges. However, their expertise might be limited to health and fitness, and they may not have the perspective needed to help you navigate complex emotional or personal problems.

4. The Work Colleague: You have a colleague who is always up for a coffee break, lunch outing, or after-work drinks. They are great to chat with about day-to-day work life and office gossip. But, they might not be the best person to turn to for personal advice or guidance on sensitive issues outside of work.

5. The Hobby Group Member: Someone you met through a shared hobby or interest, like a book club, sports team, or art class. They are wonderful for discussing your shared interest and spending time together during related activities. However, their knowledge and support might be limited to that specific hobby, and they may not provide the best advice on broader life issues.

These individuals can play an important role in your social life, providing companionship and enjoyment. It's valuable to recognize their strengths and the specific type of support they offer, while also seeking out other sources of advice when needed.

Ready to Build the Right Support System for You With Help From a Therapist in Bel Air, MD?

Is it hard for you to ask for what you need from your loved ones because you don’t want to come off rude or demanding? Are you nervous about adding new people to your support system because you’ve been betrayed in the past? Was an effective and loving support system not modeled for you by your mother? It can be hard to create an effective support system when the people in your life are not in alignment with your goals and dreams.

If you’re finding it challenging to build or maintain a supportive network, therapy might be a beneficial step. As a therapist specializing in relationship anxiety and difficult mother-daughter relationships, I can help you identify and overcome the barriers to finding the right support. Therapy is a form of self-care and can provide a solid foundation for building a healthier support system. Reach out to me for therapy services, and let’s work together to enhance your support network and improve your overall well-being.

Finding the right support system is crucial for maintaining a healthy and balanced life. By understanding what a support system is, identifying the right people, and knowing the different types of support, you can build a network that truly enhances your well-being. Remember, it’s not just about having people around you—it’s about having the right people who can offer the support you need. Take the first step today and consider how you can build or improve your support network. Your future self will thank you!